Twas the week before Christmas, and seriously stressed,
Hustling and bustling to to cook up my best.
Spreading holiday cheer, and obliged to cavort
I knew this week’s blogging time would be cut short.
As post-time drew nearer, I lay in my bed,
while visions of deadlines filled me with dread.
More days had passed, and while buying gift wrap,
I remembered that deadline and muttered, “aw, crap.”
When out from my brain there arose subject matter,
a recipe to make us all happier, fatter.
Away to the kitchen I flew like a flash,
Well, more like the saunter of drunken white trash…
But for now I excitedly want to show,
just how to make your coterie grow.
With velvety chocolate, whose purpose is clear,
we’ll build a treat that is easy, austere.
After months of trying to occupy the void left in my life since last December, it’s here. Christmastime is finally here. This, the season of sharing, caring and putting up with shoppers pushy, angry and overbearing, is upon us. I’d like to say I’m prepared, but this season snuck up on me like a stealthy, yuletide ninja and I can say I’m about as prepared for this season as Marcus Bachmann was prepared for heterosexual sex with Michelle. I’m not sure how December always seems to creep up on me, as if there weren’t 364, 24-hour-long warnings to help me get in gear. Yet here I stand, ruggedly-handsome-in-that-slightly-sexy-way-but-I-don’t-want-to-admit-it-for-fear-of-you-disagreeing-with-me and completely, utterly and totally unprepared! In fact I have partially written cards from last Christmas that I have yet to send, but instead of making myself feel like a failure for being 1 year late, I like to think that I meant to write them a year in advance and I end up feeling incredibly smug and superior to everyone else. And that’s really what Christmas is all about, isn’t it?